Thursday, March 26, 2009

Trinity

Two nights ago, the girls and I watched The Secret Life of Bees. We cried our eyes out, even Mina, which I think is a developmental milestone. I think it's the first time she's cried during a movie. It's a mark of maturity. While the credits of the film rolled, an Alicia Keys song came on and Mina stood in front of the TV and started to dance. Inspired, I got up too and we danced. And after some coaxing Maya was up. After some freeform flowing about, we reverted to one of our favorite pastimes, the Can You Do This Dance game, which I have played with some of my closest friends at parties, at nightclubs, in a living room to the radio. The girls and I stood in a triangle dancing and laughing, like we do often, and it was a snapshot of our lives. I know not of a bound closer or stronger than between the three of us.

We love our Papi. We gush over him and get all excited when he comes home. We all, in our own way, yearn for his approval and affection. He gives it freely and he is protective and loving of his girls, but Papi knows the goddess triangle-bond in our house is an interlaced and powerful thing. The girls and I will huddle together instinctively; we gravitate towards each other. We are magnetised without thought.

Maya's middle name is Trinidad, spanish for trinity. She was named after a baby I used to babysit decades ago. When he was months old I would lay him on the bed and snuggle next to him. He'd stare at me. I didn't know babies did that. He once lifted his tiny hand and placed it on my cheek before he went to sleep. His name was Trinity, and he moved me, which I didn't know a baby could do either. When he was about one and a half or two, his parents found out he was fully deaf. He was the most special baby I'd ever known until my own trinity was formed.

The girls change daily now. They move beautifully in the dynamic of our world; so smart and responsible and fun. I love to hear all the daily stories and how they interact in the worlds outside of the house.

Maya likes a boy, at least today. Don't tell her I told you. She doesn't crush easily and it's fair to say she's extremely picky. Her last huge crush was on the singer Chris Brown, but the day she learned about the abuse allegations committed on Rhianna, she ripped his posters down off her walls in long shreds. Good for her, I thought. So, she kind of likes this boy M and he's not like the little jerks who troll around the school halls as they let everything and anything fly from their mouths. M is a devout Muslim. Maya and he have had conversations about being peaceful. M goes to the counselor's office when it's time to say his daily prayers, and most importantly, he's nice to her. Oh and he's tall. She said, "He's not allowed to date until he's 16." I said, "Neither are you." We laugh easily over this though she knows I'm not kidding.

Mina is having her best school year yet. 4th grade has been solid. It's not A+, but it's a far cry from dreaded 2nd grade. Since 2nd grade, I stay very close to her teachers telling them to email me on any slip up. It helps a lot. Mina still has big focus issues and I had to go in recently so the three of us, the teacher, Mina and I, could figure out how to rein in some focus. Mrs. H. asked Mina very sincerely if she felt she as unable to focus, like, her brain wouldn't let her. It was a fair and warranted question. Mrs. H. said that recently while she's lecturing or writing on the board she'll turn around and Mina's seat will be empty. Mina's at the back of the room, getting tissues, f'ing off with the pencil sharpener, helping someone with some unrelated thing. Mina told her earnestly that she could focus, and I know she can too. I know she doesn't have ADD or anything else. She's just really driven by the rules of her own brain. I love that about her. But -- and I've said this a hundred times -- I still gotta get her through school, y'know? Check out her latest tennis video below. This girl has laser focus -- and quite sick hand-eye coordination I might add.

Anyway, I just love them both so much. Just thought I'd share that, again.


I'm off to the Bay Area in the morning to visit Betsy. I made her raw macaroons and raw granola this week, and I packed Whitey Heidi up in the car so we can climb Mount Diablo on Sunday. In a few short hours, I'll be driving up the 5, over the Grapevine and through the California almond orchards. Night, y'all. Happy Weekend.

12 comments:

Kristin C. said...

I love hearing about women and their special bonds with one another. My Mom, Aunt, Cousin, Grandma, and are best friends....I didn't know this until I went off to college in AZ and missed them more than my heart could bare. My Grandma passed away 3 years ago...and she waited until her circle of women were with her and then she went peacefully. I hope my last moments are like that too.

Have fun with your friend in the mountains drinking coffee, eating yummy treats and biking your heart out. Sounds wonderful!

Marigoldie said...

Oh so lovely. Have a blast with Besty and WH.

nec said...

My Mom was home with me during her last months on earth. I knew when my sisters and I were all at her bedside and she said "Yes, there you are my little girls" that it wasn't going to be too long before she would pass away, she did 2 days later... I miss her so much more than I ever expected.

Enjoy your time with your sister-friend :o)

And Mina has a wicked backhand! :o)

Michael B. said...

What a beautiful post! I so wish you were coming just a bit further north into Sacramento. :) Your writing makes me feel like I already know you and your love for your girls. Coincidentally, my one and only, Tess turns 14 tomorrow. Have an awesome time on Diablo...

Poundpapi said...

Beautiful post, and I can't help but comment on the dancing thing: my friends and I have always played "Would You Be My Friend If I Danced Like This?" I can't imagine being friends with people who wouldn't play games.

julie hasson said...

A lovely post Danette! Hope you're having a great time in SF!

Ali la Loca said...

Such a nice post.

You will be in my mom's backyard when you climb Mount Diablo.

I wish I could hop in a car and be close to hear just as easily...

Enjoy!

Deirdre Cross said...

Beautiful as always, D. I'm moved to tears thinking of my own sisters and mother. The dancing and the singing. That's love.

Hugs, Dee

madness rivera said...

I love to hear the stories of other family female bonds. I felt so lonely as a kid that all of this is pure joy for me, and I love that many of you experienced it too. Mostly I love hearing that it lasts and that as time went on, you guys still felt the same.

j-boo said...

You are such an amazing mom! I love hearing about your girls and adore when you write about your love and sweet bonds with them!!

How cute about Maya's crush too.
I love it!

xoxoxo, Jinxi

Tessa said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Ruth

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madness rivera said...

Thanks Robin!