Friday, June 29, 2007

Does Jehovah Want You to Go to Parties?

While I was at work yesterday, the girls were read a story by Grandmutter called "Does Jehovah Want You to Go to Parties?" Maya told me about it when I took her to TaeKwonDo. It was just us because Grandmutter doesn't believe in TaeKwonDo. I said, "Does He want us to go to parties? I'm guessing yes. A resounding yes."

But Maya said that He doesn't, surprisingly. She said Grandmutter punctuated the stories with true accounts of hedonistic partying by the Israelites after they crossed the Red Sea, and how Jehovah didn't dig that too much. I said, "They were free! Wouldn't you party?" Maya said that yes, yes she would, but these people got carried away and Jehovah ordered them all killed. As Maya put it, "God told the guy to go kill all of his friends that went to the party." I whispered, "Harsh." Then Maya told me about how at one party this king had a beautiful belly dancer and he told her she could ask for anything she wanted. I said, "Yea, Yea, King Herod and Salome." Maya said, "Man, you know this story?" I said, "I love these stories. I've read them all plus I saw the Rita Hayworth movie. Go on." Maya said, "The belly dancer wanted the head of somebody on a platter." "John the Baptist," I said. She said, "Yea, what's up with that?" I said, "I think we really should steer clear of these kind of parties."

Apparently Mina asked Grandmutter, "What if my friends want me to go to their party?" And Grandmutter said, "I have a better friend here," and she held up two hands, pantomiming towards the heavens. Maya demonstrated in the car and we both busted up. I said, "Ok, ok, let's not laugh. But remind me to talk to Mina. Make sure she doesn't think she'll get beheaded at the next Chuck E Cheese rager."

6 comments:

Mel said...

That made me laugh so loud here in my work cubicle. Hysterical. Just happened to read the latest entry. Thank Jehovah I did because I needed a good laugh. The last line was a doozie! Love ya

Jonathan K. Cohen said...

I have a friend who escaped from her Jehovah's Witness family. Jehovah was not a good influence on them, as they created a hell on earth for her in preparation for her nominal ascent to heaven. I don't think it was merely a case of an abusive family; I think the religion provided a model and framework for her abuse.

It would be better for your kids if they weren't exposed to it at this time. When they're teenagers, they can read the Bible (or Kafka) and discover the idea of a punitive God for themselves, without the threats and bullying. (Telling a child that God is going to kill her for going to a party is simply inhuman.)

madness rivera said...

You can choose your god, but you can't choose your family so I can't really ban her from being with the kids -- and if she's with the kids she's gonna talk about Jehovah. . . But I like the bold suggestion, JKC. I say, Bring on the Jehovah talk. It sparks conversation and inquiries from the girls that causes them to dig into their own sense of spirituality. I won't sheild them from the religious views of others, but we can talk about it a lot and explore what's a good way to express spirituality; maybe a better way for us, at least.

Kathleen said...

hee.
i am so glad i have you to model what good parenting looks like...

julie hasson said...

It sounds like you've got a great attitude about it all. You're right that you can't pick your family -and that it sparks conversation and opens debate.

What a cool mom you are.

bettyboop said...

Oy Vay!!!!
girl, you have your hands full! you certainly are becoming an expert in tolerance and acceptance. buddah would be proud.
Evolution Forever!